Lot have been said and written about attitudes…..What exactly are attitudes?

The dictionary meaning of attitude is:

“1. a feeling or opinion about something or someone, or a way of behaving that is caused by this: example :It’s often very difficult to change people’s attitudes.

2 If you say that someone has attitude, you mean that they are confident and independent, often in a rude or unpleasant way.

All of us have been following a set of attitudes we learned in our lifetime through our own experiences and those of others. Some of them are positive ….helps us to live our lives to the fullest-enjoying every moment. There are other attitudes which make our lives and that of others miserable - harming ourselves or others around us.

There are a few other attitudes in life which are neither negative nor positive……but can be put under the category - General - living our lives the way we have been and living and doing nothing to progress in life - in our careers, our relationships, our physical, mental or spiritual aspects of life.

Attitudes are nothing more than habits of thoughts, and habits can be acquired. An action repeated becomes an attitude realized.–Paul Myer (in Developing the Leader Within You by Maxwell)

The essence of Life as human beings is progress…..One thing all of us have to understand clearly is that if in any way we want to improve our lives -want more money, bigger house, smaller cell phones, have good health, recover from our addictions-if any, looking for “peace within”, serenity and contended life, we have to work on ourselves to change for the better. There are no two ways about it.

“Changing our attitudes will definitely change our altitudes” But the problem is that many of us are not ready to change…..we fear change….Friends “pain doesn’t come from change ….it comes from resistance to change”

Here are a few “action steps” which will help you to work on the “Change of Attitude” Process. Try to work on it honestly and thoroughly. After all it is your life which can improve for the better.

First of all, do a little self searching exercise. You can ask yourself these questions:

a) Am I happy with the growth at my work.

b) Am I having a loving and understanding relationship with my wife/husband/partner or parents or children?

c)  Do others treat me the way I want them to treat me?

d) Am I grateful for whatever I have today?

e) Do I believe that “my feelings are results of my thoughts” can I can change myself to think differently to feel and act differently.

There are many, who answer in affirmative to the above…they are doing a wonderful job with themselves are working on other areas in life where they feel there is scope for improvement…..and the focus is on progress and not perfection. Because once we aim at perfecting a particular thing or behavior…..we don’t even start…it is human nature….we tend to be perfectionists…..either we do it perfectly or we don’t do it at all…So friends …..we are not looking to have a noble price for living a happy and better life but are targeting at improving from our present one.

If the answer to any of the above questions is in negative, then it is time we get going and ACT.

How do we go about changing ourselves?

Here are a few tools which helped me alter my attitudes thereby changing my life for the better .These tools have worked for me and thousands of others…and if these worked for us…it sure will work for you too…the only thing you have to do is let them.

1. Be honest, open minded and willing to change - This is the most important step. Until you are honest with yourself, open to ideas and suggestions, and Willing to improve ….there is nothing in this world which will work for you.

2. List down all the negative characters or traits you have - You can always take the help of your wife/husband/partner or a close friend as sometimes…we may not be able to see in ourselves what others can see in us.

3. Start working on them from “easy to hard” - start from the easiest one …the ones which requires less effort and gradually move on to the harder ones….break the harder ones into smaller parts….have a time limit…..set your own schedule… . but do a little bit on a daily basis….that way we will remain in touch with ourselves.

4. Compliment yourself on your achievements….howsoever small……compliment yourself …that way we are motivated to do a little more.

5. Thank your Higher power for whatever you have and whatever you were able to change……If you don’t believe in the concept of God…thank your stars……thank the universe…or thank science……the idea is not Whom to thank……but is to be grateful.

6. Snap yourself out of negative thoughts….and be conscious about them. One tool you can you can use is to wear a thick rubber band on your wrist and snap it whenever you are having negative thoughts…it will hurt you a little whenever you do that. By doing this you are giving signals to your brain that “pain is always comes from negative thoughts”…and if we don’t want pain….we might as well not think negative. Try it for 30 days and I am sure you mind will be alert whenever a negative thoughts comes.

7. Learn from your experience: “The one thing that is more painful than learning from experience is NOT learning from experience!”

Friends, life changes and if we WANT to be happy….we need to keep changing with time….and keep altering our attitudes to the changing situations and circumstances.

Most of us just need to start……..take action……. take the first step……….rest , God of your understanding and the universe will help you move on……

“It is easier to get older that get wiser”

Choice is yours….

When thinking of a career in management, the focus should be not just on exams, but also how the forms are filled which form an important basis of your selection during interview.

The starting process for applying to a B-school begins with filling the forms and keeping their deadlines in mind. The main tests for which forms are available are Common Admission Test (CAT), Xavier Admission Test (XAT), Management Aptitude Test (MAT), Joint Management Entrance Test (JMET), Graduate Management Aptitude Test (GMAT), Narsee Monjee Management Aptitude Test (NMAT), and tests conducted by the Indian Institute of Foreign Trade (IIFT) and Faculty of Management Studies (FMS).

These exam forms are different from institute forms. While the exam forms allow you to sit for the admission process of an institute, the institute forms are more detailed which seek to find the kind of person you are and thus form an integral part of the Group Discussion or Interview part.

One needs to remember while filling these forms not to give vague answers or not to write casually as they can come up during interview putting you in a difficult situation. Another important thing to bear in mind is that you need to remember what you wrote in the form. You wouldn't want to give a different answer to the same question during interview; the panel will be quick to point that out.

Statements of Purpose or SOPs are common for those filling foreign university forms. However, most Indian B-schools have also taken the cue and are asking for SOP. These help the committee to know about your character and your aims and in general, about the kind of person you are. These are just as important as your marks in the exams.

Therefore, do not be casual about the forms instead take your time to fill the forms presenting your strengths in the form. Before filling the form write down vague ideas about your answers and then read them again to provide better answers. Grammar and spellings are important so do not think of going lenient with that aspect.

Do not give the usual and repeated answers instead try to be innovative, but that does not mean to distract you from what is right. Try to be honest instead of writing vaguely about yourself.

Keep the above tips in mind and remember to give your best.

EXPRESS YOURSELF: The ability to communicate what you know effectively can be a rewarding experience.

It is supposed to be what people fear the most. Speaking in public according to most is a nightmare. There are some who call it an art. But for all of us, it is a skill that needs to be inculcated. And the good news is, there is a lot of help around.

“Usually, public speaking is referred to political speeches,” says Ravi Ramanathan, of Ramnathans Public Speaking Institutions in Chennai, which has been in the business of helping people master this art for several decades now. “What we deal with is the ability to stand up and express yourself. This develops leadership qualities and boosts confidence levels.”

With acute competition in almost every sphere of life, the ability to communicate what you know effectively becomes a must-know skill.

Surprisingly, there is not too much stress on this nowadays, say educators. “Earlier, public speaking used to be something which every student, while at school or college, liked to perfect,” says Nirmala Prasad, principal, M.O.P. Vaishnav College for Women. “Nowadays, it is becoming extinct.”

“A lot of students, glued to their books, go for centum in physics and mathematics,” says Nina John, a soft skills trainer and consultant with over two decades of experience in the field. “They don’t pay any attention to public speaking skills till they go for an interview or a group discussion.”

The emphasis on rote learning kills creativity, says Ms. John. “Many students cannot take a sentence from their textbook and put it in their own words.” The fading habit of reading books also contributes to this inability to communicate, she adds. “The ones who are either reading or watching a wide variety of TV programmes do well. They know so many facts!” But limiting your fare to music channels and reality shows means filling up on trivia, which does not help much.

Once students realise they need to master public speaking skills, fear and self-doubt are usually the first barriers. “Speak to express yourself. Don’t worry about impressing other people,” is the first advice Ms. John gives to her students. “Will they laugh, will they make fun, such questions are the biggest mental block,” she says. “Just make sure you know your subject. Accent and grammar are just icing on the cake.”

Apart from knowing your subject, it becomes important to know who your audience is. “Talking about nutrition to college students is different from talking about it to corporates,” says Dr. Prasad. “You need to prepare your speech to suit your audience.” It also helps to be aware of the time limit to communicate effectively.

Dr. Prasad says that she has a mandatory public speaking course for all students in the first year of college. “They have to pick a topic and present it in front of 70 - 100 people.” Students are encouraged to give seminars on all their subjects and are evaluated on their presentations all through their course.

The transformation is visible in 80 per cent of the students, she adds. “Timid or introverted students change when they move from the first year to the second.” By the time they enter third year, they can face any audience, she adds.

Typical public speaking courses have theory-cum-practical sessions. “We cover communication, interpersonal skills and personality development,” says Mr. Ramanathan, describing his course. Practical exercises on extempore speech, prepared speeches, group discussions, and debates are also conducted. Video recording of the speech, mike exposure, voice training exercises, gesture exercises, confidence building and eye-contact exercises are some of the other aspects of public speaking covered. “It is not all done in one class, but in a staggered fashion,” he adds.

Regularly listening to the news on television to understand pronunciation and reading out aloud help, says Ms. John. She is one of the founders of the Toastmasters club in Chennai, an organisation that helps develop communication and leadership skills. To speak well, listening to others is also important, says Ms. John. Regular practice is also needed, she adds.

But apart from such general guidelines, effective public speaking is best learnt in person. Ms. John says: “There are three things you cannot learn by correspondence — bharatanatyam, swimming and public speaking.”

Whenever the evil forces reign supreme, the Lord will come to the rescue and set things right. Accordingly Lord Vishnu, the preserver of the Universe (according to the Hindu mythology) has taken 9 "Avatars" or incarnations to eradicate the evil forces and establish goodness and prosperity. (Lord Vishnu is yet to take his 10th Avatar - "Kalki). Of these incarnations, the seventh is the Sri Rama Avatar. Sri Rama Navami marks the birth of Lord Rama. From Ugadi for the next 9 days, we celebrate the Vasantha Navarathri. It concludes with Sri Rama Navami. It is celebrated on the day when "Navami" (9th day after the new/full moon day) and the star "Punarvasu" occur together in the Tamil month of "Chitirai". (Sometimes it might fall in the "Panguni" month also). The Hindu tradition has a lot of meaningful practices. The Tamil months Panguni and Chitirai (April & May) are the hottest months of the year in this part of the world. Hence the "Prasadams" offered to God will be directly related to the weather conditions.

For Sri Rama Navami, the "Prasadams" offered are Panakam, Neer Mor (Diluted Buttermilk), Vadai Paruppu and Panchaamirutham. These items are also prepared at the temples and distributed as prasadams to the devotees who come to seek the blessings of God. All the above mentioned foodstuffs can be taken to bring down the body heat. They also make up for the loss of body fluids due to the excessive perspiration. Apart from the above, in olden days, there was a custom to gift hand-made fans to other people. Since there was no electric fans then, to reduce the effect of the heat, these hand-operated fans were very useful during the summer months. It was indeed a thoughtful gesture.